Love and Character Defects

I never meant to start a war
I just wanted you to let me in
And instead of using force
I guess I should’ve let you win

Miley Cyrus
Wrecking Ball
2013

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I put all my cards out on the table for you on a sunny Saturday

Now I want to pick a few of them back up and keep them close to my heart instead where

 - where are you
can’t see them lately 
I didn’t know 
now I know now
I want you to stop rubbing your eyes, it hurts to see you strain to see 
what you saw without effort or strain 
on Saturday and in the West Loop 
with the busboys 
cheering us on -

I can only see them or maybe I won’t look my eyes have never worked well with this sort of thing.

I’m sure this didn’t seem bad to you. Definitely not like a battle.

This is a war though, and there have been many battles before and there is still flesh and bone left on the grass.

Some of it was not mine then.

But now now I’m forced to carry it around my neck 
secret 
sin
you can’t see it even with those glasses I love on you.

This Saturday I will wake up with more humility I will feel my unseeing

too little too late

but even that is not humble and will be discarded.

I do not wish to be right or “know” the answer anymore.

“I guess I should’ve let you win.”